We have only been married for five years and I no longer feel as excited as I was about her during our first and second year. I have tried to figure out what the problem might be, but found none. We use to spend time just talking but now we don’t seem to enjoy each other’s company what can I do?


Marriage is like a garden; if you do not cultivate it, weed will overtake it and chock out the good plant. If you do nothing for your marriage to be good enough for what you want, then nothing good will happen to your marriage. Many people get married thinking that it will be always be a bed of roses or a smooth jolly ride, they become disappointed when challenges begin to hit the marriage. Once the fantasy stage wears out in a marriage, the couple faces years of reality when love is beyond mere feelings to where commitment and sacrifice is more important.

It is only natural that after you have been married for sometime that the marriage might appear to be losing some spice. It happens to all marriages because marital commitment is more than verbally saying ‘I love you’, it is proving love daily with your attitude whether you feel that partner is perfect or not. Many things have happened to you both andthe union that may bring about changes. For instance, if you have changed jobs and spend more time at work than you spend at home, it would appear like you both no longer have time for yourselves. Also when you start bearing and raising children, it can impart on the relationship. This is why to have a good marriage you must constantly nurture it like you would do to your garden.

Creating time just to enjoy each other’s company has to be deliberate. You also have to make conscious efforts to be interested and involved in each other’s life and affairs. If you don’t make this happen then nothing is going to happen. Start by examining the communication between the both of you, if communication has grown cold, start by making little effort to bring it back to life. Check if you too have been too busy to make time investment into the relationship. Carefully observe if there are other things taking up the time she used to spend with you especially children. Marriage was ordained by God and so anytime we feel someone thing is not adding up we are supposed to run to Him for help and direction.

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The author wisewalk

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